If you don’t love yourself (the person you are when no one else is around) then its more than understandable that you can’t have real love for others either.
We can’t build ourselves up when we are determined to bring others down just because we are upset by how we see them living their life..esp. on social media.
If you ever find yourself making comments or being involved in conversations about the way a person looks or judging them for absolutely no reason other than you seeing something in them that you don’t think should be there then you need to check yourself.
I think we all have had to ‘check ourselves’ at one time or another for varying reasons and that’s okay…but not ever checking yourself & thinking that being a bad bitch or a G justifies you really being an asshole then only you can help yourself because the good people around you won’t want any part of that miserable mess.
I recently learnt that some people I have known for a few years and have shown me support during my chemotherapy phase were just doing that for their own little kicks. One of them in particular would often reach out to me and invite me to visit her up in the country side was an active participant in ‘bashing’ me for not ‘seeming as though i really have cancer’. What is that supposed to look like exactly?
The same people who were praising my strength and composure throughout this adventure (because I think the word ordeal denotes a negative experience and mine has been a learning one for the most part) were secretly viewing my posts and pictures and judging me for being a ‘stoner’, and generally for appearing as though I have no care in the world.
I immediately blocked these people from being able to see my information on social media but then I was forced to face the reality that they are the devils that I know; there are still the ones I don’t know who maybe masquerading as my supporter but are hating on me in the dark. And so I was forced to reevaluate everything I share online. I have also tried not to ‘over share’ but it seems as though I need to not share my joys or (especially) sorrows in any format whatsoever; half of the people clicking ‘like’ and ‘lol-ing’ are doing this with sketchy intentions. They are energy vampires – whether they’re aware of this or not its become a ‘way of life’ for them.
I don’t think enough of us are aware that narcissism is a real disease that its probably affecting some of the people we interact with, those people who seem so very selfish and we wonder why; those who pick fights for no rational reason than because they ‘like drama’, those who can’t keep friends because they don’t know what friendship is and especially those who blame others constantly for their displeasure with their life. Generally these people are just miserable as fuck and want to make those around them feel the same way.
My focus is on taking care of my health and raising breast cancer awareness, the latter I will overshare as much as I can because I hope to affect change in the detection of this disease. I’m uber skeptical in what I post about myself as it relates to going through treatments – seems like with all the pseudo empathy available I stand a greater risk of having bad vibes directed my way than positive ones. While I know no one can corrupt me from my purpose I would rather not encourage them to even think they can by offering them a glimpse into my life they don’t deserve, even if its just peeping through the facebook veil.